Browsing Category

Pregnancy/Baby

Pregnancy/Baby

Isla Grace’s Birth Story

I finally had some time to write this out – warning: it is long!  When I was pregnant I loved reading others’ birth stories, and was totally engrossed in even the most minute details of the experiences, so I am sharing my own story with that in mind.

2 weeks before Isla was born, I had a little bit of a scare.  I went in for a routine prenatal with my midwife, and things turned very serious very quickly.  Normally these appointments were a lot of talking about how things were going, listening to baby’s heartbeat, and getting measurements.  I’d been measuring small which led to us having to get a growth scan at the end of October, and it turned out to be fine.  At this appointment though, I’d lost 4 pounds and was measuring even smaller than my previous appointments.  My midwife decided to do a quick ultrasound to make sure that I had enough amniotic fluid left, but couldn’t find much.  Her demeanor changed very quickly from happy/laid back, to really concerned.  She told me to go to triage right away, and that if I did have low amniotic fluid, I would have to be induced.  Cue the panic and tears from me – but after a few hours of monitoring and an ultrasound, they found that everything was okay.  However, the whole experience left me feeling really anxious, and pressured to get the baby out naturally before something could go wrong.  Induction in my mind meant throwing my entire birth plan out the window because I just didn’t think I could handle a medically-induced labor without pain meds.

1 week before she was born, I woke up before work feeling really ill/crampy.  I felt so “off” that I actually stayed home from work because I wasn’t sure if it was the start of early labor.  I’d had a few days of symptoms that could be labor, but nothing ever really kicked off.  It got to the point over the next week where I’d have what felt like real contractions, and I would just tell myself “it’s all LIES!  You’ll be pregnant forever!”.  A few days before she was born, I’d reached the point where when anyone would ask how I was feeling, the kindest response I could come up with was “still pregnant”.  There was a lot of anxiety surrounding when and how labor would start, and I know Jeremy would feel it too…because anytime I would call him, even just to see how his day was going, he would answer the phone with a little bit of fear in his voice.

The Tuesday before Thanksgiving, I worked a full day.  I’d been feeling really tired all day, that just seemed to get worse as the day went on.  I’d also been having what felt like minor contractions, but I ignored them because I figured it was just my body faking me out again.  I seriously felt like I could fall asleep on my drive home, but was fighting it – so I decided to go for a walk once I got home.  I had to stop running a few weeks before this just because it was too uncomfortable, so my new routine was to go for a brisk walk while listening to The Birth Hour podcast.  It was so cold outside!  I really had to bundle up for my 45 minute walk, and pushed myself to walk fast to get my blood flowing and wake myself up.  When I got home, I was feeling much better and got ready to make dinner.  I started the stove, and my water broke.

Like I said in my last post, I knew exactly what it was when it happened.  It was so uncontrollable that I started laughing before I called Jeremy to tell him that this was it!  He got home, we ate dinner, and then called triage and our doula to let them know.  We decided to wait out the next few hours at home since my contractions hadn’t started, and I didn’t want to go to the hospital too early.  I double checked the hospital bag, Jeremy loaded the car with everything we needed, and then I headed to bed around 10:30.  It was definitely not a restful sleep because I knew what was coming, and I was scared.  I was woken up at 2 am by a contraction, climbed out of bed and went downstairs to let Jeremy keep sleeping, and work through them on my own.  They were coming about 7 minutes apart, and after 45 minutes I realized that they were mild enough that I could probably try sleeping through them on the couch.  I knew I was probably in for at least 12 hours of labor, and needed to conserve my energy – thankfully, I was able to go back to sleep while my body did the work.

At 6am, I was woken up by a contraction too painful to sleep through.  When I was pregnant, I had a lot of Braxton Hicks contractions, which made me wonder if I would really KNOW when I was experiencing the real thing.  Trust me, you know.  Our goal was to labor at home as long as possible, but since I was GBS positive, I had to get to the hospital to get my first dose of antibiotics by 10am, so we headed to the hospital at 9:30 – totally in disbelief the entire time.  When we got to triage they confirmed my water broke, and admitted us.  The nurse said that we were lucky since there was only one tub room left since “everyone decided to have a baby today!”.  Before they moved us from triage to our room, we decided to take our last picture as a family of two.

8 hours in and so tired. Little did we know we had another 22 hours to go.

Once we settled into our room and met our nursing team, I participated in a virtual reality study for their anesthesiology team.  I basically spent 10 minutes working through contractions on my own, followed by working through contractions while “swimming with manatees” through a VR headset.  It was definitely distracting!


Shortly after this, my contractions really started picking up.  They were about 4 minutes apart, and getting painful enough that I couldn’t talk through them anymore, so we called our doula Cara to have her come meet us.  I started crying as soon as we made the call because it was all suddenly feeling very real.  Cara was there pretty quickly, and was amazing at helping me talk through what I was feeling which helped me to calm down and find my focus again.

The next 5 hours went by in a blur, the contractions never got closer together than 3 minutes, but they were really painful.  So painful, that I thought I might be nearing transition.  I was surprised by how vocal I was during those contractions, a long, low sound was the only thing I could do to feel like I could get through them.  It was surprising how good it felt when they ended!  I asked the midwife to check my progress at this point, but to only share the number with Cara and Jeremy.  I was having trouble coping with the pain and was worried if I wasn’t as dilated as I thought I was, I would get discouraged and want to give up.  I found out later that I was at 6 cm and about to enter transition!

I was offered the tub to labor in, and even though I was afraid to change positions because of the pain, I did it.  Cara warned me that often what happens in the tub is that you get a little bit of a break from the contractions, but when they return they can be more painful than they were before you got in.  I’m so glad she told me this, because it is exactly what happened – and I even had some contractions that came one on top of another, so it would be a few minutes before I’d get a real break.  I was in the tub for two hours (with an antibiotic break after one hour), but it only felt like 20 minutes.  At this point I knew I was in transition because I felt like I was losing control of my coping skills, I’d lost all track of time, and was feeling trapped in my body.  It was scary, but I had Jeremy and Cara talking me through it which prevented me from panicking.

The tub was feeling uncomfortable, so I decided to get out – and this is when things started going a little crazy.  My blood sugar was crashing, so I was eating runner’s goo when I was coherent enough.  I couldn’t walk without help because I wasn’t able to get a real break in between contractions anymore, and when one would hit I would have to hit the floor on all fours.  Once I got back to the bed, the contractions were unbearable and my body started involuntarily pushing at the peak.

Everyone got concerned at this point, so the midwife checked me again and I was only at 8 cm – bad news to be pushing when you’re not fully dilated, so I knew I might be in trouble at this point.  I spent the next two hours working through the contractions and trying to breathe through the urge to push (this felt impossible), and towards the end of those hours I started asking for an epidural.  We decided when I was pregnant that if I absolutely knew I wanted pain medication, to use the code word “Murphy”.  This was because I thought I might reach a point where I’d say I wanted an epidural, but wouldn’t be serious about it.  The code word meant I was serious.  But, I’d also asked for a little bit of push back from Jeremy and Cara to be 100% sure that I wanted it – so they spent another hour helping me through contractions until I begged to be checked again and found out I had been stuck at 8 cm that ENTIRE time.  At this point the contractions were on top of each other and I couldn’t keep myself from pushing – I was exhausted and in so much pain.

Just then, the baby’s heart rate dropped and the rest of the team rushed into the room.  They put an oxygen mask on my face, and put a scalp monitor on the baby – and it all happened so quickly, during a 5 minute long series of contractions (yes, really).  My arms were flailing, screaming at the top of my lungs “please help me!  I need Murphy!  I need Murphy! I’m scared!”.  I vaguely remember seeing the look on Jeremy’s face, tears in his eyes, looking shattered at how powerless he was to help me.  He says now that it was pretty traumatizing to see me like that.  I had completely lost all control and ability to cope with the situation, and it wasn’t my finest moment.  But, I know now that I was handling it the best that I could.  Once the baby’s heart rate was back to normal, things settled a bit and the midwife agreed that an epidural was the best decision.  I ended up getting the epidural after almost 22 hours of labor.  The pain relief was so immediate that I told the anesthesiologist that I loved her.  I remember her response being “yeah, we’re pretty popular around here!”.  I’ve never been more thankful.

The midwife checked me an hour later and I was completely dilated!  So the plan now was to get some sleep, and let my body push the baby as far down as it could, until I felt the urge to push again.  I spent the next 4 hours in and out of sleep, waiting for the sensation to hit me, but it never did.  I was getting some pretty intense low back pain though, so we called the midwife in at 5am who checked me to find that the baby was at a +2 station (basically about to crown!).  She flipped all the lights on, and said “this is it, we’re going to have a baby!”  I remember feeling a big sense of relief, and determination even though I had no energy.

I started pushing at 5:15 in the morning, but was making very slow progress.  We found out later that Isla’s hand was next to her face the entire time, which is what got me stuck in transition, and also why she wasn’t coming out as quickly as she should have.  After 3 hours of pushing (which felt like 45 minutes), she finally came out!  She was warm, and slippery, but she had a super short umbilical cord so they could only put her on my belly.  We waited a few minutes for the cord to stop pulsating before Jeremy could cut it.  They finally were able to move her up to my chest, and I was able to get a look at her face.  Jeremy and I were both ugly face crying the entire time.  Isla was so alert, and let us know right away (by sucking on her tiny fingers) that she was hungry!

It was a completely overwhelming experience, and nothing like I expected.  Even though I wanted to get through it without medication, I’m really proud of how long I stuck with it, and feel that getting the epidural was probably my best chance of avoiding an emergency c-section with the situation we were in.

Isla will be a month old this week (how is that possible?!), and these last 4 weeks have been a blur.  New parenthood is tough, but we’re slowly getting the hang of things and finding a routine again.  We love this little lady so much.


Thanks for reading!

 

Pregnancy/Baby

Baby Smied is Here!

A week ago today around this time, I was planning on publishing a new blog post.  I had it all written out – it talked about how we were still anxiously awaiting the baby’s arrival, how I was as ready as I was going to be, and how I also thought I might be pregnant forever because there just weren’t any solid labor signs.

I’d worked a full day, went home feeling completely exhausted (not normal for me) and decided to head out for a 45 minute walk.  The cool air felt great, and the walk woke me up a little.  I got home, walked in the door, started making dinner, and my water broke while I was standing at the stove.  It was so uncontrollable, and so unexpected that I actually started laughing before I called Jeremy to tell him that things had started.

My contractions started 7 hours later, and that kicked off over 30 hours of labor (yes, really) that ended when our little girl finally arrived at 8:21AM on Thanksgiving morning.  We love her so much that it actually hurts…something I couldn’t have ever understood before she arrived.  I’m getting choked up just writing this out!

dsc_2428


imag1769-1

Things have been insane since we got home from the hospital on Friday afternoon.  We’re not sleeping very much, mostly spending our time adjusting to the profound role changes we’ve just gone through.  I plan on writing out her birth story here in the next week when she gives me enough free time to do it :).  Thanks to everyone who has called, texted, stopped by, or even just offered to help – we appreciate you all so much.
Smied Watermark

Pregnancy/Baby

Baby Smied’s Nursery

Hello, birth month!  How are we already here?  I can’t believe it’s almost time to meet our little one, pregnancy feels like it’s gone so quickly and so slowly at the same time.  I’m definitely noticing that I’m more emotional than usual lately.   I think it’s a combination of mourning the idea that I will no longer be pregnant soon, and have my little “buddy” in my belly everywhere I go, and also the idea of transitioning into actual parenthood.  It’s a big change – scary, and exciting, and just…everything all at once.

We finally finished putting together the baby’s nursery, and I love it.  Since we opted to leave the baby’s gender a surprise, we didn’t go with a theme, or super gender-specific colors.  This works well with our decorating style anyways, which tends to be neutrals with pops of color.  The walls are Benjamin Moore Gray Owl, and the trim is White Dove (No surprise there.  This is my favorite white and I use it everywhere I can!).

When I was pinning ideas for decor, I quickly fell in love with the Canada-based brand Pehr Designs.  I stumbled across their alphabet quilt in a local boutique here in town, and had to have it, and then saw the mobile on Amazon.  Things quickly snowballed from there.  Their items are precious and unique, without screaming THIS IS FOR A BABY!  Just our style.

dsc_2380dsc_2393dsc_2396We also used the RASKOG utility cart from IKEA for diaper storage next to the changing area.  The baby’s room is small, so we had to get creative with storage/organization.

dsc_2405I hand painted the print on canvas above the changing table, it was inspired by a SugarBoo Designs print that I couldn’t fit in the budget, but loved the message.  I have a ton of ideas for art, but I want to wait until we meet this little one so I can personalize it a little more.

dsc_2374

dsc_2390

dsc_2369

The countdown has begun, and soon enough we’ll have a baby in here.  Feel free to send some good thoughts our way as we get closer to bringing this little one into the world!
Smied Watermark

Save

Save

Favorites Pregnancy/Baby

Third Trimester Favorites + Baby Update

So next Tuesday marks the start of November, and also the start of our birth month.  We’re both really excited, but I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t also a little scared of what’s to come.  We’re both hoping for a natural/intervention-free labor and delivery, and that isn’t something you can really plan for.  You just do the best you can to prepare your mind and body for the upcoming challenge, and hope for the best outcome for everyone.  We are due in a month, which means little baby Smied could make his/her entrance anytime in the next 2-6 weeks!  Our hospital bag is (almost) packed, the nursery is (almost) ready, and the house has been cleaned from top to bottom.  As we approach the due date, I’ve been getting a lot of questions from family & friends:

How am I feeling?
Emotionally, see above.  Physically, like the size of a small house.  My belly has really popped over the last 2 weeks!  Also, there is almost nothing on the planet that I can consume anymore without getting heartburn.  Even water.  I’ve heard that this means baby will be born with lots of hair, but both Jeremy and I were baldies when we were born, so I’ll believe it when I see it.  I’ve been getting lots of Braxton Hicks contractions, mostly when I workout – and I’ve transitioned to longer walks most days of the week instead of runs.  The maternity support belt I bought for running makes things comfortable, and I miss the runner’s high, but the contractions make it too uncomfortable to attempt more than walking with short bursts (5-10 minutes) of running in between.  I think this is just my body’s way of telling me to slow down while it gears up for labor, and I’m listening to it.  Thankfully I can still do my Barre workouts, no problem.

How is the baby?
Baby is head down, and active!  Although on the smaller side, we think.  Over the last few midwife appointments my fundal height has consistently measured 4-5 weeks behind where I *should* be.  I’m not surprised since I’ve looked very small this entire pregnancy, and my mom has told me my brothers and I were all only 6-7lbs at birth.  My midwife isn’t overly concerned since the baby is still showing growth signs at every appointment, but I have to go in tomorrow morning for a growth scan to make sure everything is okay.  Please keep us in your thoughts!

Any labor symptoms?
Nope!  Baby is cozy and snug in there – lots of hiccups and baby dance parties (with toes in my ribs – OUCH!), especially at 11pm every night, like clockwork.  This is our first baby, so I have a feeling we’ll go over the due date.  I say take your time, sweet pea!  Just go easy on my ribs, okay?

With just a few weeks left of pregnancy (eek!), I wanted to share my final list of pregnancy favorites, for the Third Trimester.

You can find my other pregnancy favorites here:
First Trimester Favorites

Second Trimester Favorites


thirdtri1. Mind the Bump App
We’ve assembled a pretty amazing team of UMich staff, midwives, and our Doula to help support us through this experience.  If I know myself though, I’m just like my mom and when I get sick, or I’m in a LOT of pain, I tend to really go inside myself to focus through it.  I have a feeling this will probably happen when things get really intense at the end of the first stage of labor.  For that reason, I’ve been using this mindfulness meditation app to get into a good headspace.  In my second trimester favorites, I mentioned that I’d been really loving the Mindful Birthing book – which I’m still so glad I read.  But when I tried using the companion meditation CD, I found they were too long (25+ minutes each) to stay focused, and the coach’s voice was hoarse and not very soothing.  This app uses the same techniques, but in shorter 7-15 minute sessions.  It offers meditations for day 1 of pregnancy all the way through the 2nd year of your child’s life – which I bet are some of the most challenging years.  I love it!  On iOS & Android.

2.  Ina May’s Guide to Childbirth
I picked up this book on the recommendation of a friend who said it changed her whole outlook on birth.  I really enjoyed it, as it is really thorough and takes a lot of the fear out of the process by explaining WHY your body is built for birth, and HOW it accomplishes this.  I will say though, the first chapter of birth stories was a little too crunchy for me, and were difficult to stay focused on.  Skip over these stories, and I’d highly recommend it.

3.  Old Navy Maternity Tops
In the beginning of pregnancy, pants are the biggest issue.  Your belly and hips expand in an awkward way that make normal bottoms feel really uncomfortable.  My Gap pure body leggings saved me with this.  Later in pregnancy though, as your belly starts to grow faster, and rise higher on your core, your tops are going to start feeling (and looking) ridiculous.  My belly is now big enough that I’ve developed what I call the “short shirt belly shelf”, where the shirt rides up on your belly, and then the very bottom hem curves outward like it’s trying to get away from you because of how ridiculous you look wearing it.

dsc_2288Thankfully, it is now leggings/long sweater season, so I picked up this maternity swing tank (in pink, navy, and black) for layering – it is so soft, and comfortable, and runs true to size.

4.  Burt’s Bees Mama Belly Butter & Oil
I started using this belly butter twice a day in the second trimester, and I love it.  I know they say that stretch marks are genetic and there is nothing you can do from the outside to prevent them, but that doesn’t mean I’m not going to try!  I use the belly butter in the morning, and the oil at night so I don’t ruin my clothes – the oil smells like Lemonheads candy, yum!

5.  Reduce Insulated Steel Tumbler (YETI knockoff!)
Lately I have been SUPER thirsty – I’ll chug water like my life depends on it…at least until I have to come up for air.  Jeremy picked up two of these tumblers at Costco last month, and they’re awesome!  They’re total YETI cup knockoffs, and work really well at holding the temperature.  I’ll often fill one of these up to bring to bed, and there will still be plenty of ice in it in the morning.

6.  Snoogle Pillow
I know this was part of my second trimester favorites, but I love it so much that I had to mention it again.  This thing has been an absolute life saver as far as staying comfortable with an ever growing belly – and I would recommend it even for my non-pregnant friends.  It’s the best!

7.  Lucy Darling Baby’s First Year Book
This memory book makes me freaking cry every time I flip through it and think of all the happy memories we’ll be making with this little one.  We’ve already written a note to the baby, included some stories about how we found out that he/she was joining our family, their family tree, and all of their ultrasound photos. So cute.

I’ll give a short update later this week on how the growth scan went, and also a sneak peek of the nursery!
Smied Watermark